July 27th. Hollywood, CA
Arrive to the venue, the “legendary” Hyperion Tavern, in Hollywood, CA, where the first show is supposed to take place. Odd deal already off the bat, NERFBAU, TAKE UP SERPENTS, and JUSTICE YELDHAM & His Dynamic Ribbon Device, all the way from Australia. We were a bit skeptical froom the beginning as there are NO local acts on the bill (as if LA tournouts aren’t shitty enough even w/ some local hip spazz drum band), here we have a show with three touring bands. Stay Optimistic. Arrive at the Hyperion Tavern to find this sign on the door.
OK, so onto the showcave in Silverlake. Was really looking forward to playing the Hyperion Tavern, as it has been around a while, in many different transformations, most infamously as a daddy leather bar, which still bears it’s battle scars in the war of the gay LA underground scene, in the form on a cum trough that runs underneath the bar. Mmmmmm sticky shoes. Oh well, next time.
We finally get to the ShowCave, and of course, no one really is there. A few people trickle in and NERFBAU begins to set up. After twenty minutes of fighting an awful ground hum, it’s determined that the best course of action is to say fuck it, and subtractively EQ it out. Didn’t really work but the set still sounded pretty good (from behind the speakers). Our very eccentric promoter, Don Bolles, seemed to think it was “beautiful” (cough), was he listening to us? More people showed up as the TAKE UP SERPENTS outfit began their evening actions, with looped howls, tape dirge, acoustic percussion screaming in the hollow wooden room, and dissonant middle eastern radio crackles. A great performance for sure. In and out, NO BS. Justice Yeldham (Australia) was up next, and he did NOT disapoint. Subtle mouth to glass saxaphone/sherman tank textures screamed from the jagged piece of broken glass which he commanded sound wise like a sorcerer. He knew every architectural nuance of the shard (even though he was making the glass fifteen minutes before the set by knocking out a window on some scrap door, and then modifing one of the shards to his liking . Such fucking control, this dude got chops.. Riding the edge of the glass along his lips and then sharp tuen, across face and throat (??????) he summoned hellish and beautiful sounds, textures, and violence. The bloody Aussie bug pressed up forcefully against the glass, was a live Francis Bacon painting coming to life to destroy your visual and aural fields, however his bloody theatrics didn’t come off as contrived, but more incidental of his instrumentation..(Shrug). Aussies are generally pretty up front peeps, so I believe him when he tells me that he doesn’t cut himself on purpose . Must get old having people yell “DO IT, MAN” when your bending shards of glass like tubas across your neck , right? All in all a great show to about 12 people. Hope you come back to the states Mr. Yeldham.
LA hope you stay in LA, you too JW.
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July 29th.
Ok, getting a bit hotter. After walking around Venice beach and fighting through the wall of hip hoppers trying to sell you the “illest beats on the whole boardwalk” for $2 each (which half of them are probally blank) It’s like a headphone swarm of recycled beats with an overdub archeology that makes about as much sense as the Albino Jimi Hendrix in a dress? on rollerskates who rides up and down the boardwalk, giving the same fried, confused, and slightly awkward look every time he passes. Watched the skaters for a whole, watched (and lost) four south American girls who were giggling at us and pointing, I Guess we don;t fit in at muscle beach???
After free vegan cookies (and a sphel) from the Hari Krishna ropers at the temple (haha) we ventured back to Ian BASIDIOMYCOTA’s house, ate some food, and started packing up for the show. Wait it gets good. So much like the first show on the 27th, there is a bit of confusion. We see a different address listed on their website, and about 40 minutes before the show, we get an email stating that the space has moved across the street. OK, interesting and GOOD TO KNOW if the space that you’r playing has moved right? We arrive at the space Vlad! The Retailer and the owner/promoter is very flustered/apologetic etc for the condition of the space, etc. Seems fishy. Start setting up, nobody really shows up. Ian Basidiomycota did a great skwacy/drone/sequenced mosh of a set, which really set the creepy mood of the night. Lourdes and her sister performed as Ebony Cubbie Hole? for some reason, and generaly scared everyoine out of the room, including one (or both) of the guys from NERFBAU. They can get pretty wimpy around girls anyways, especialy girls with lampshades on their heads. Throughout the show, we kept noticing a show going on right across the street (which axctually had a PA system, not just guitar amps, and about 120 people inside/outside, most of who were checking out the BANDS and NOIISE PROJECTS that were playing a SHOW right across the STREET (literally) Seems odd, no? Not really, as we soon found out that the space across the street where all of the people who may have been interested in what was happening at our event, were at another show at the OLD VLAD THE RETAILER. Double booked! What a sleezeball. The promoter would pop over into our show every 30-45 minutes and see if we were “OK” and he said he was going to “organize his old shop”. Right.
TO VLAD THE RETAILER = FUCK YOU!!!!
Oh, and if you (readers) want the rest of the story, email us and we’ll give you the longer, much more bitter, sware word laden account. OK. Fuck LA. Reeally. Mucho thanks to Ian and his family though for letting us crash, eat those amazing grapefruits, etc. Your kindness is appreciated.
July 30.San Bernadino, CA
Ok. Pretty grumpy after only a few days in this nut-sac of a part of a state (Southern California) stick shit weather bubbles your brain into the dumbness that plagues this part of the world. Two LA shows, $0 in gas/merch/kind words erc….UGH… but as we’re heading out of LA proper into the Inland Empire, we feel slightly calmer, a better kind of dirty, and little did we know, we’d meet the coolest/most annoying dog ever, and the show would turn out to be pretty good. Samur from Conscious Summary is a real solid dude, and had homemade salsa waiting for us when we got there. The majority of the night was spent roping Comet (the dog) back inside, because every time someone opened the door, that little shit would run out, he was cuuuute tho, a true pain. For all his thanks to us for us keeping his ass safe inside, he decided to drop a big shit right on the Take Up Serpents preyer rug. Classy(ic). Conscious Summary was really good, doing a long mix of peeks and swells with some traditional instrumentation, but made the guitars and basses sound more like earphones into the sewer than 4/4 rock band tools. Good Job. Riververb was the reverb death star with guitars, ski-mask microphones, and death foot switches that resempled the paino keys of the inferno. Slowly building shuttering drones, smashing the audience with hammers of squelch, and then slowly repelling back, and giving time for the air to clear, and then smash again, AGAIN , AGAIN. Great stuff from this seasoned pro!
July 31. San Diego, CA
Ok, Finally getting out of LA, and on the move, Was starting to feel like we were going to be trapped there for the next three weeks, which just may have enduced a mini mass suicide amongst all parties involved. We arrived in San Diiego after almost an hour of circling the campus to find the wonderful eyesore on the UCSD Campus known as the Che Cafe. We kinda hopped on this mixed rock/noise/dance/squirm show the last minute, which featured some ex bay area pats, Nero’s Day At Disneyland, as well as Mincemeet Or Tenspeed and Bubblegum Octopus. This place really does look like the kids from KIDS puked all over this innocent little cafe, and then they started having shows here. Apparently the school has been trying to kick them off campus for the last twenty plus years (ever since they’ve been there) and they keep fighting. The true D.I.Y. sweat spirit. Nerfbau and Take Up Serpents started off the night with short but dynamic sets. The Serpents left one of their operatives back in the greater Los Angeles area to work on alternative missions, but the extra sound space gave them more breathing room for doom. Nerfbau screamed down people’s throats and yelled at the sound guy for “not knowing what the fuck he’s doing” Typical.
MUCHO thanks to Frank M/Riververb for the wonderful hospitality/support/food/soda etc…You are a true lifesaver
